Ok… i’m not sure how many of you work with customer service (up close or over the phone) but there have been times where people say things that totally set you off, but at the same time set themselves up for great comebacks. So post things you’ve WANTED to say, or been tempted to say but just not said because you know you’re controlled enough not to do so lol or unless it’s your last day.
Here’s some of mine… Keep in mind these are mostly computer related, I do work in tech support. but feel free to post yours whatever they are related to!
them “Hi my internet doesn’t work and my computer won’t turn on. Are you having an internet outage?”
me “Well we sure aren’t having an outage with internet but if your computer won’t turn on and you’re asking me that question it would seem you’ve had a lack of intelligence, have you rebooted your brain recently?”
them “I had my sony rep come over and check on my tv and do it’s yearly checkup, but now i dont’ get any sound.”
me “Oh thats interesting, are you sure he hooked it all up right? Either that or you may want to make sure he didn’t diagnose it with test-tubular cancer or possibly tv-std’s?”
them “RAHHHHH Do you have any IDEA how long I’ve been on hold? GGRRRRRR”
me “Apparently not long enough to cool off, hang on hit hold button”
them “I want to speak to your supervisor!”
me “sure lets do that.”
them “What’s their name? I want to know their name first!”
me “You’ll be transferred to Helen Wait.”
them “Helen wait?”
me “Yep, you can sit on hold and go to Helen Wait.”
them “Look, do you have any idea who i am?”
me “Nope.”
them “I’m an IT consultant, I’m also a network administrator for blah blah.”
me “Awesome, I play counter-strike too!”
them “WHY DOESN’T MY EMAIL WORK!”
me “Well sir, on the internet when you speak in caps lock people see it as yelling, due to the fact that you are yelling at me I’m assuming perhaps you had your caps lock on when you entered your password? You cant yell your password in sir, it’s caps sensitive.”
them “Hi I can’t get on the internet and I just bought this mac”
me “AHA! I think we found the problem!”
them “Your email sucks! I get ALL THIS SPAM! How do i stop it.”
me “All of it? Hmmmm… not using the internet would be a start.”
them “Hey, I have a really stupid question?”
me “You came to the right place, I have a really stupid answer.”
them “UGH this is so frustrating… wow I would HATE to have your job.”
me “Ah, thats ok, I’d hate to have your intelligence level, I think we’re on the same level of understanding.”
